This is a book by an author I met once. This is a book by an author with wounded hands who cried too much when you beat him at poker. This is a book by a dead man. This is a book by a conscientious woman who resisted the force of the powers in charge at the time. She is also dead. This is a book your great-grandmother wrote recipes in. This is the book your great uncle was carrying the night he was shot. I’ve never read it. It might be good. This is the book that most profoundly affected me when I was a child. This is the book your father kept all of his debts in before they came to take him away. This book is my diary that I kept for a few years when I was your age. You can’t read it, sorry. This is a book about meatpacking plants in Indiana. I’ve read it. Kind of boring, but graphic. This is a book about sex in India. It has pictures. You can’t read it. This is a book about icebergs written one hundred years ago. Can you believe it? What did they know about icebergs? This is a book written by a romance novelist well before they knew what sex was. This is a book about jazz. Jazz at the time was better than rock and roll. Do you know what rock and roll was? You don’t, do you? This is a book about Jesus. He died and came again. This is a book about Mohammad. He’s Islam. This is a book about easter eggs. Do you know that the Russians made elaborate jewelry in the form? This is a book about sonnets. They are kind of poem. This is a book about love. Your father wrote it before he died. He was a handsome man. This is a book about Hannibal. He used elephants in a military campaign. He crossed mountains. He was magnificent. Your father died when you were very young. This is a book about boy scouts. Your father was one. He learned to build fires. This is a book about securities. I’ve never read it. This is a thesaurus. It tells you not what words mean but what other words are like them. Your grandmother liked magazines. The thing about magazines is that nobody keeps them. We’re so alone. This is a book by a French philosopher who lived for a period of time up in a mountain. This is a book by an American who lived in a cabin. This is a book by a Greek who lived in a cave. The man who wrote this book became chancellor of a university under Hitler and was discredited. The woman who wrote this book was courageous in front of Congress when they asked her to turn in her friends. The man who wrote this book lost his mind tragically. The girl who wrote this book died during the Holocaust. Aunt Jean wrote this book. I think I’m the only one who ever read it. This is a cookbook. The best recipes have handwritten notes about things you can substitute in a pinch. I’m very sorry about what you’ve had to go through. I have tried to love you. I’m sorry that I’m dying. This book makes no sense to me but it is very famous. This book is about a war in ancient Greece that nobody remembers but because of this book, everybody remembers it. Write things down. This book is about Dublin. Will you have more tea? Don’t worry, there’s plenty.