he will read the letter
Anna had certain desires, and they were not all easily described. There was something that she wanted to recapture, even if she wasn’t sure they had it to begin with. Some things she could make clear, such as her need for security, her need to be secure in him, and to have a sense that they still had a future together. A desire to see a way out of it. A desire to know that she is not alone.
he will form a point
Anna knew that the topic was dangerous, but she also knew that he would not leave her. He would not leave her because of what they shared. They both tossed and turned at night, with the same beautiful memories, the same horrific dreams.
he will help when he can
Anna’s nightmares are more symbolic than Charlie’s. She sees strange omens, disappearing men, cast off garments hanging in sky. He is more of a literalist: a drowning boy, variations on the same, over and over again.
he can go away again
Anna and Charlie had been through the Helen issue before, more than once. She knew that he loved Helen in a different way than he loved her, but not a better way, and that if he felt lost enough, he might simply wander off again.
he must not part from her
Anna sometimes dreams of limbs without bodies.
he will follow you down
Anna sometimes wishes she had the strength to cut and run. She tires of being the one who always has to hold it together.
he will come in time
Anna is embarrassed by her own need to need to be saved, by the thing in her that always feels like it is falling.
he is not here now
Anna’s dreams of childhood toys are always somehow monstrous.
he will be old and with time will follow
Anna reads with jealousy of tropical birds that mate for life.
he has so little here now
Anna knew that he was nearly as lost as his brother, devastated by all that they had lost when they were just boys, and now this. And her alone to anchor him, just when she needed him to be her strength.